Back to Basics

     I had forgotten how much can happen in a week. Such a cascade of emotions seems to be following me around and I have been looking over my shoulder saying just wait a minute, please, just give me a moment to get my shit together. Today I have a day of peace for the first time in what feels like months. Today all I have to do is take care of my self and my companion. Today I start to watch those emotions with a little more attention. I knew they wouldn't just bugger off. They are tied to me with little bits of string and shoelaces and they don't mind tumbling along behind me for as long as it takes. 

     I had also forgotten how when you are by yourself and on the road how very challenging it seems to be able to accomplish all the things you need to in a day. I suppose last time I did this I wasn't working so that made it a little easier. I seem to struggle to satisfy my basic needs and make time for all the things I feel I need to be complete. Maybe I need to readjust my idea of complete. Food, water, shelter, sleep, exercise. That last one seems to be the hardest to accomplish, and all of these with the smallest monetary output possible. I suppose that is part of the adventure and part of how you learn to be adaptable. And learning is the whole point. 

     Way back when I first started this blog I found a woodcut print called "Flammarion." It has remained the background to this blog and the background to my computer screen ever since. Flammarion refers to 'the scientific or mystical quest for knowledge.' Among many other circumstances and needs this is a big one that has led me on this venture. I hold in me an insatiable lust for knowledge. I can't seem to ever know enough, about the natural world, about art, about human emotion (my own and others), about people, about the stars, about everything. Here we have an exercise in seeking that knowledge. I was stuck in Portland, I had enjoyed a year of momentous growth, I had watched myself evolve in a way I had no idea was possible. And then I got a little lost for a while. I was crippled, by many things. The city was a big thing, what once had fed me and filled me now drained me and left me feeling empty and sad. So into the woods I realized I needed to wander. And the quest for knowledge continues... 

     Sweet wandering dreamers,

     Alex